Weak
by steph2009
Summary: He didn't understand why his father ordered him to play nice with the Yukimura girl. Oh, even at nine, Chikage Kazama understood female devils were rare; but he didn't care. There was nothing special about her aside from her gender.
1. Chapter 1

**Weak**

 **Disclaimer:** Hakuouki does not belong to me. I am just playing with the characters.

 **Summary:** He didn't understand why his father ordered him to play nice with the Yukimura girl. Oh, even at nine, Kazama Kazama understood female devils were rare; but he didn't care. There was nothing special about her aside from her gender.

The Yukimura girl was much younger than him. This was his first impression of her. His second was that her twin brother followed her around—everywhere. Wherever she went, he was there too, like a second skin or a leech.

Chikage Kazama sighed and dropped from the tree limb he had been resting on. The children—because really that's what they were—startled. Chizuru dropped the flower crown in her hands, conveniently right atop of her brother's head, and stared at him. He nodded to her before moving on.

"Um…" He heard a timid murmur behind him. "Would you like to play with us?" She asked.

Without looking over his shoulder, Chikage answered, "No."

He didn't understand why his father ordered him to _play nice_ with the Yukimura girl. Oh, even at nine, he understood female devils were rare; but he didn't care. There was nothing special about her aside from her gender.

Still, his stomach dropped when he heard a quiet "oh" from behind him. He grit his teeth. He would not turn around. Kazama were not weak, simpering fools who bowed before a female. Especially a female sounding close to tears. He forced his feet to move toward the house and tried his best to ignore the conversation behind him.

"It's okay, sister. You still have me."

"I know, Kaoru…but it still would have been nice to have a new friend."

He didn't stop, didn't dare look over his shoulder. Chikage repeated the words his father had drilled into him as he walked up the stairs. Kazama were not weak. A devil always keeps his word.

He had said no. He couldn't turn around now and play. That would not be honoring his word.

Besides…he didn't need friends.

Chikage ignored the way that hole in his chest seemed to grow wider.

"Oh, you poor child." He tensed immediately at the words and the voice. The mother of those two in the garden stood in the hall with him.

"What do you know?" He snapped. He was aware that he was being rude and that his father would probably lash him for talking to the mother of the Yukimura Clan like this, but he couldn't find it himself to care. Who did she think she was pitying him?! His lips parted in a snarl, but her sad eyes never changed.

"I know you are lonely," she said. "But it is a loneliness you condemn yourself too." She looked out at the garden where Chikage could still hear her twins playing.

"Shut up," he growled before storming away.

She didn't understand. No one could. Even the next head of the Yukimura Clan wouldn't…those pampered little brats would never understand what it meant to be raised in the Kazama Clan.

The Yukimaru Clan was safe.

The Yukimaru Clan didn't have spies from other Clans lurking in their halls. They didn't have servants just waiting to dig the knife in a little deeper.

The Yukimaru Clan knew nothing.

Those simpering pansies in the garden would never know what it was like to have to survive an assassination attempt at the hands of your own family.

The rage inside of him, the jealousy he could feel pounding away at his insides, threatened to bring his powers to the surface. He could feel the heat in his veins and knew he needed to reign it in.

If his father knew he had lost control like this…

The fire inside of him died down to a dull shimmer. His fists unclenched…and, as if a marionette suddenly without strings, he collapsed against the wall.

Then…for the first time in years, he cried.

He cried for the ache inside his chest that demanded he fill it with things he couldn't have: like friendship and his mother's and father's love. He smothered the sounds with his sleeve…and fought to stop the flow of tears down his cheeks.

 _ **Kazama were not weak.**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Doe Eyes**

 **Disclaimer:** Hakuouki does not belong to me.

 **Summary:** Hardly a month has passed since that day, but many things have changed. Chikage had said the Yukimura Clan did not have enemies; he was wrong. And he never hated himself more for it.

* * *

All that was left of the Yukimura Clan was rubble and ashes. He knew the story; after all, it didn't take much to figure it out. He clenched his fist at his side. He had turned ten the day the Kazama Clan received the news.

The Yukimura Clan had refused to go to war with the humans, so the war had come to them. Human men had burned down their home and murdered as many as they could. No one could find the Yukimaru twins, but there was no evidence that they had perished with the rest of their Clan. Still, no amount of searching had turned up either of the twins.

He was almost glad.

His father had talked about taking the Yukimaru girl in if her whereabouts became known. Chikage knew he had not thought to do so out of the kindness of his heart. Females were nothing more than breeding animals to the man. Just look at Chikage's own mother. The only time the two spend time together was to keep up appearances that they were happily married around the other Devil Clans…and to attempt to conceive. But his mother was raised from birth to know her place in the Kazama Clan.

Chizuru Yukimura…her face flashed before his eyes. Big, innocent brown-almost golden-brown eyes and that easy, cheerful smile: he had hated them not too long ago. Cursed her for being so sheltered, so coddled, but now…now his heart ached for the suffering she was going to have to endure. There was loneliness in the Kazama Clan, but at least he still had them. The Yukimura twins had lost everyone and everything in one night.

Wherever she was, he hoped she stayed hidden. His father would stop at nothing to obtain her. Chikage did not want to see that girl turn out like his mother. He did not think he could watch as his father brainwashed her into thinking her only worth was to lay down, spread her legs, and pop out children. He didn't want to see her gentle kindness broken by his Clan nor did he wish to see her innocence taken away.

Yes, it was best for her that she remain hidden. She had no true allies in their world.

Still, those doe eyes and that innocent smile reared their head in his mind from time to time as he grew older. And as he grew, that hole in his chest did too. Over the years, however, he began to forget her and the hole in his chest became normal.

He forgot why he had fought so hard to not become like his father. The lash marks on his back were the only reminder that he had ever opposed him.

XX

In Ikedaya, a female devil surprised him. Throwing herself on top of the human samurai who had fought against him so pitifully and glaring at him with such fire despite the blood running down her cheek…was Chizuru Yukimura. Those doe eyes—even narrowed in anger—could never belong to anyone else.

Once more, his world was turned upside down.

And the female responsible didn't even recognize him.


End file.
